TEEN ISSUES-----how to avoid jealousy

Shira33 Posted - 07 June 2001 17:00

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What if you're jealous of your friend and as much as you like her you just don't enjoy being with her because you just feel so jealous, her being prettier and more popular etc.???

MODERATOR Posted - 11 June 2001 19:04

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There are two ways to avoid jealousy. We discussed this at length already so Ill review in short:

1) People are only jealous of s/t they can attain. Humans aren’t jealous because lions are stronger than them or that birds can fly. And the peasant isn’t jealous when the princess gets married, since he knows he can’t have her anyway.

So too you must realize that Hashem gives everyone what He wants them to have. You can no more get what your friend's popularity has than you can birds' wings. If you focus on this you will not be jealous.

2) Life is a package deal. Even if you could get a bird's wings, you wouldn’t be jealous, because a bird is just a bird, and you'd have to give up being a human to get it. So too everyone in this world has their "baggage." Someone may be jealous of another person's wife, but that person has maybe a health problem; you may be jealous of someone s looks but maybe they have an abusive home.

You don’t want to be jealous of anyone else because having what they have means having their problems too. And once you discover all the problems your friend may have - now of later in life - you won’t want to trade place with her. You’ll be happy with what you have.